Episodes of the Reality Resistant

Say, the best way to lower abortions is to increase access to contraception, and improve sex education? Studies prove this, and families that preach abstinence include pregnant teenage girls?

Why, slash sex-ed funding and make it really hard to access contraception, then make abortion illegal, that will SOLVE EVERYTHING!

What makes people this stupid? They have to get up, get dressed, and eat every morning - or maybe they don't.

Maybe they get up, get dressed, and have a cup of coffee for breakfast, thinking that skipping breakfast will help them lose weight. Then they act like entitled asses all morning, and go out to lunch with their idiotic buddies to talk about a bunch of stupid crap in their lives.

Charities actually find your donations of canned goods to be annoying, and have for a very long time. They've only told you this recently because they finally overcame the human nature to "say something nice, or say nothing at all", but all the canned hominy and old spam that you gave actually went to waste.

But we've done the can drive for 40 years now, and it helps the kids to think of those that are less fortunate! I see no reason to stop now, besides, those charities will just waste the money anyway.

Does it even matter to these people that they are wrong? How on earth do they sleep at night? Do they even retain the knowledge that they are so ineffably stupid?

Sure, they come back from lunch with food in their bellies, but they're unaware that they missed a great presentation from a foreign policy institute on the impact of sanctions on Iran. Your average conservotard spends the rest of the day busing about like mad, unable to say no to anyone and ensure that there is enough time to finish the tasks at hand. When there is a lull, random research is done, and snide remarks are made about the biggest hurricane, ever, "slowing to a trickle".

I take minerals and vitamins to help my immune system, but the person that I live with got sick last week. While I'm not as sick as he was, I'm still pretty out of it. Slightly delusional, unable to concentrate well, and nervous about getting other people sick

Well, you were still able to write this blog post, you should be able to do your job.

Oh, for &%$*'s sake, thank goodness management isn't that stupid.

Uh, Yeah, No One Cares

I'm pretty narcissistic, everyone knows that. I think I'm awesome, that my life is epic, and that everything I say is the most profound thing ever. However, I also have a little perspective, and am increasingly able to keep my mouth shut. This has come from several instances of opening my mouth, or posting something, and then being smacked down, hard. I've been called out, yelled at, and lost friends for the things I've said. I certainly don't have a captive audience that would flood comment threads with concern for me. I've realized that I can't expect people to care about my life, even when nothing else is going on, and it really doesn't bother me.

But today, we are in the midst of a huge election here in the US. And a significant portion of our population experienced a monster storm, that created flooding that brought sharks into New Jersey (that was a fake) and displaced a ton of people. I'm worried about my friends in D.C., since their apartment has a huge window in place of a wall (they were fine, fortunately). Sh*t is getting serious, but I've got a few Facebook friends, well respected in circles that I'd like to be in, who myopically obsess over their own lives today. It burns me up inside, and makes me wish I could post the title of this post as a comment on theirs.

Feel free to call me bitter, I accept that. I am bitter as hell, and this is my blog.

No One Knows

If Obama wins. If the Democrats take the House and have a filibuster proof majority in the Senate. What would be so horrible for America, for American business, for so many Americans, that they are working themselves into a frothing rage, throwing good money at this, and blatantly cheating to get what they want. What is truly so frightening? What horrible things would happen?

I'm sorry for their lost years, I really am. I'm sorry that the things that were taught them turned out to be wrong. I want no harm to come to anyone. I'm just tired of seeing people sleeping in the street, and I think that we can do better. Really, their worst nightmares can't be much worse than this.

Stupid Fear Mongering

This week, at a location that I go to, a person that goes to the same location announced to me and another person that Google made a deal with the government, the federal government, that allows the government to spy on our email. I was dubious, but didn't bother to ask clarifying questions about the source of the information. Despite lying to me several times, and despite the fact that we both know about the lies, this person gets real defensive when I display any skepticism of any claims.

I figured that a deal of that kind would show up on the news websites that I read, but I didn't see anything about it. So, today, I searched for 'federal government can read gmail' and got to an article about some people who are suing Google because they think someone there is reading their email. You can read the details of that case yourself, but the interesting part of this article came at the end, with a note about a letter from 11 Republican members of Congress to the President about a proposed executive order.

Proposed, not executed, not signed, but proposed, which means that it is not in effect yet, nor has Google done anything to comply. But, having once been a Government Documents Reference Librarian, or, if I want to sound like I speak Klingon, since I once worked the Ref Desk at Gov Docs, I did a little searching to find all Executive Orders. I started at Thomas.gov, which is linked on the right, used a few of the links to find the Executive Branch site, then did a search on there to find out that the Executive Orders are on the White House's site.

Can you guess which one isn't there? Yeah, that's right.

Furthermore, because it is proposed, we, the people, can use our knowledge of the proposal to urge our president to not sign it. Funny thing, us having a democracy and all. All we have to do is, you know, participate in it.

Eleven Eleven

Oh christ, I have no idea what to say.

Musings on a Tolerable Day

I am counting the days until one of my doctors is back in town, and then until I can get my massage. My upper back is incredibly cramped, and I've got to stop sleeping on my side. I'm going to attempt to take some sleeping medication, and then sleep on my back. If that doesn't work, I'll have to sleep on my front, or on the couch.

Stephanie won on Jeopardy again tonight, which is a surefire way to ensure that she doesn't win tomorrow, unless Jeopardy is preempted by the debate, which I probably won't watch. The only way that I can stand potentially awkward and/or painful information is to watch it with random strangers that I can occasionally talk to in order to avoid the things being said on the TV.

Getting the cat's teeth cleaned was potentially one of my best decisions this year, but it might rank lower than other decisions, which is a shame, since it really improved my kitty experience. He is playful and vocal; demanding and affectionate. I love it, but now I just have to remember that I can't keep spending money, because I already spent a lot on little kitty's teeth.

And racists, the whole lot of them, bloody racists.

Sundays are for Football: Week Six

See my new Football Blog for this post: http://urslikesfootball.blogspot.com

To Do

I am gaining weight
Take me off the stimulants
Take me off the drugs
There is nothing to do
But eat

Feel the salty, sweet, fatty, juicy goodness
It stimulates my senses
Lets me forget
The hate
The madness
My overwhelming weight
The silence of anonymity
Of reading popular things
Critically acclaimed, famous, adored things
And seeing all the flaws

I go for a walk
To the market
For what? To shop
To buy, to look, to talk
To eat

I can get on the train
Head to Chinatown
For what? To shop
To buy, to look, and probably not talk
To eat

What is there to do?
But consume
Food, drugs, goods
To talk, about what?
I've said so much
To make, to write, to build
But my back hurts, and my neck is stiff
More than that, no one cares
My own life feels cliche
Those who need to hear, won't.
Can't
They will sit, stand, and take me down
They will tell me, with legitimate concern
"You don't want to be in that part of town"

What to do today
Two walks
Cats soothed
An errand run
A show watched
What to do today
But eat?
Drown out the crushing boredom
It is too soon to sleep

---

Written while overlooking the Ashby Flea Market at this time. Afterwards, I went for a walk around, through parts of Oakland. Saw people settled in to sleep the night away, on the streets, waved to people, and had some little dogs excited to see me. I got back home, safe and sound, and feeling a little bit better.

Unhinged, October 12

I want to post something this week, before the Sunday Football post, but I have been a bit overwhelmed with work. Which leads me to the point of this post. The United States is going crazy right now, you may have noticed. A bunch of astrologers are saying "Mercury is in retrograde", which is less significant than the fact that 20+ years of conservative/reactionary propaganda have wrapped up a generation of people - mostly white men - in a frothing rage. At the same time, decades of acceptance, racial tolerance, and women acting like human beings, instead of brooding mares, have created a generation of people who can see the other group for who they are - who they always have been.

In short, the latter generation is on the move, having a good time, and being productive (when they're not trying to drown out the former generation with substance [ab]use). The former generation is getting older, smaller, and angrier. They're frothing at the mouth now, maybe they always have been. The problem is that the latter generation is getting wiser and wiser to them, and getting more and more clout with the mainstream, and is increasingly able to stand up to the former.

My perspective, of course, will always be skewed by the enormous amount of information that my brain holds, and can recall quickly. Having overcome my addiction, and survived a resetting brain injury, and all of the ramifications of the behavioral consequences, I can see the world in striking clarity - from 40,000 feet in the sky, to the bottom of the ocean, and all points in between. It creeps me out, but it also puts me at ease. Things catch me off guard, but few things truly surprise me. For instance, there was a person in my life that I considered a friend, but he turned on me, and now, he is trying to stoke my paranoia. Instead of succumb to this, dwell in my own rage, and even quit, I decided to use the tools provided, and am rising like a phoenix.

I hope the same can be true of my generation, raised on equality, honesty, and acceptance. We need to keep pushing forward, and maybe, that generation steeped in resentment, anger, and entitlement will wise up. Sadly, I think most of them will just die out, clinging fiercely onto their anger. A sad legacy for those born after such a joyous victory.

Oh, Shut Up Already

But, but, but,
I have all these reeeeeeasons why
I can't do that
It isn't that big of a deal
I'm laughing it off

Good gracious
If you're complaining
You have a problem
I will help you fix it
Get over your pride
Grow up, please

Oh, so you're just gonna do this this and this
You're gonna make sure you don't meet the definition
But you %&$#ing do
With every breath, you can't see how it manifests
Do you need a phd in gender studies to see the problem?
Do you have to be black to know racism?
How much evidence do you need to %&$#ing trust me?
I do not lie, I know what I know
And you are all @^*& monkeys, dancing on a string
%&$# you
%&$# you
%&$#

---

I went for a walk while at work, at this time, after calling people out on [Social Media], only to face people doubling down, and other frustrations. I started walking, but was going too fast, and my legs were hurting, so I decided to sit on some exercise things that were set up under a tree. There, I wrote that little poem.

Sundays are for Football: Week Five

See my new Football Blog for this post: http://urslikesfootball.blogspot.com

Working Myself Up

I can totally see certain parts of the US unravel, especially as other parts of the US get better. I thought that I could be above it all, but now, it is getting to me. I've started to get worried, and I'm talking too much. I'm feeling the tension around me at work, and my own paranoia is being actively stoked by at least one person.

Things keep racing through my mind today, and every day, and I know exactly why. I feel a petulance coming on, and the only things that can stop it are mostly unavailable.