We Need a Miss Manners for the Internet

I have absolutely no sympathy for the person that sends an email to me, either as an individual or as part of a large mailing list, with a demand to be taken off an email list. I have some respect for the request if I happen to be in charge of that mailing list, but if I'm just a user, especially if the email is to me directly, that person can kiss my ass. This week, I got one sent directly to me, and rather than respond or forward, I hit the delete button. One of my co-workers suggested I send the person an email saying that I did remove them from the list, and while I like the way that guy thinks, I opted for deleting rather than causing more havoc.

I know that people get on lists that they later realize they don't want to be on, and I also know that many lists are on other lists - signing up for the Hmong Student Association got me on the hotline to all the major API groups at UC Berkeley - and there may even be people out there that sign up group email addresses on those mass sign-up sheets that groups have out during festivals. It happens and the best way to get off the list is to ask someone to remove your email unless you happen to be at a university with a university account and can remove yourself.

What bugs me are the demands and the comments along with the demands about how they don't care about the subject at hand or the group in general. I liken it to being in a room where a conversation begins, then loudly shouting how you dislike everyone there and can't find the door. There are more polite ways to extricate yourself from a situation without making an ass of yourself and without insulting everyone else.

Now, the email that I sent out was a response to two other people. The email that I got back stated that this person was not interested in this group and wanted to be removed from the list. I was just about as able to remove this person as any of my grandparents are and I happen to have a very high opinion of the group this person was talking about. I might have forwarded a message that read something like "Hello, I don't know how I got on this list, but I would like to be removed. I contacted the other two people in this thread as well but they have not responded. If you cannot remove me, could you forward this message to someone who can? Thank you."

My mother always says that I'm constantly complaining that people do not say things correctly, and its true that I hold people to a high standard of decorum. Being as emotional as I am, I react strongly to rudeness. I have thin skin (metaphorically and literally - well, its transparent and burns easily), but I'm a human so I problem-solve and try to figure out how someone could achieve the same ends without acting like an ass. So if you're on a distribution list that you don't want to be on, do as Urs says, use please and thank you and your request might actually work.

Now, I could have been nice myself and forwarded the message, no matter how rude, but the person insulted my group, so &*#$ them. I mean, hell, I'm not a computer.